Warning: In case the title didn't clue you in, this post is full of toilet
talk!
As I've written in previous posts,
there are many differences in how Chinese and American people care
for infants. One huge difference is in toilet training. In the U.S.,
most parents start potty training around age two or even three. These
days, most American doctors tell parents not too push their children
too hard and to wait for the child to show signs of being ready to
toilet train. In China, many families start training the baby to use
the toilet nearly from day one. I think William was four days old
when Ming's mom first started teaching him to pee in the garbage can
(in Chinese, “baba” 把把).
When I try to explain this to my family
back home, it's hard for them to suspend their disbelief. How can you
potty train a newborn? Can you actually
potty train a newborn? Well, the answer is somewhat complicated.
William is nowhere near being ready to use a toilet, obviously, as he
can't even sit up on his own. But I guess we are laying the
foundation for him to be able to do it much earlier than most
American children. Ming's mom claims that he should be able to around
age one, though he may need a diaper during the night until age two.
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| Who needs these when you have a garbage can? Photo via Taobao.com |
How does one teach
a baby to go potty in a garbage can? It's pretty simple. You just
hold him over the garbage, especially when he first wakes (when he is
most likely to need to go). You can whistle while you do it, which
helps the baby associate the sound with using the toilet. Eventually,
he develops the habit and will try to go potty when you hold him in
position over the trash—in fact, William already does this at four
months old.
I'm sure you still
have a lot of questions. Is it really worth doing? Does he still wet
his diaper? Is it healthy? Isn't it tiring? What about when he is out
of the house?
As for me, I'm a
bit lazy and this is a practice that I still find a bit strange. I
basically go along with it to appease my mother-in-law. When I'm
alone with the baby, I normally don't hold him over the trash. I do
see the value in this practice as it will eventually get him out of
diapers and much sooner than many children. But it's a lot of work
and also a bit unhygienic because not only do we (okay, mostly m-i-l)
“baba” the baby, but he is often in cloth diapers or no diapers
at all. It's a lot of mess. Moreover, I'm not sure if this practice
is good for the baby. I read an article in Chinese stating that
holding young babies in such a position (over the trash) is not good
for their developing spines. Though interestingly enough, this early
toilet training trend isn't popular just among Chinese, it is also
practice in other countries. Even in the U.S., it is a movement which
in parenting circles is known as “elimination communication.”
There is even a few books about how to do it!
As for
diapers, William is definitely still using them and will wet them if
he isn't held over the garbage at regular intervals. When we take him
out of the house, we always put him in a diaper. Many Chinese will
allow their children to run around diaperless, sporting split seamed
pants in which they can pop a squat and use the world as their
toilet. A lot of foreigners are shocked and even disgusted by this
practice. I generally don't mind it, as I don't see how it's that
much worse than people who allow their dogs to do their business
wherever. What I don't like, however, is when people allow their kids
to pee and poop freely indoors (like on
the chairs in
McDonald's, as I've witnessed) or on people (I got soaked by a
toddler on Beijing subway without so much as an apology). There have
been countless reports on Chinese social media about Chinese abroad
causing an uproar for allowing their kids to no. 1 and no. 2 in
public places such as on airplanes, subways, and while waiting in long lines for the bathroom.
As for me, the
verdict is still out. I'm not sure if I'll ever be a firm believer in
baba-ing or not. I guess I'll have a stronger opinion if and when I
start reaping it's benefits—when William is off the diap.
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